One year anniversary

It is hard to believe, and even harder to accept, but the one year anniversary of my Dad's death is coming up this Wednesday. I still find it somewhat amazing that one whole year has passed since one of the worst days of my life.

On reflection though, I have come to realise that although it was a terrible awful day, Mom and I got through it. Though I must admit the first three months of this year were the worst of my life. I would wake and feel that I could hardly breathe at times, the guilt would wash over me in waves, and I was thrown like a bobbing boat into the ocean of emotions and grief. You get to see who really are your friends in times like these, some have fallen away, others have hung in there and been there when I have needed an extra push.

Mom and I are going out on the Wednesday. We have decided that we are going to celebrate his life, not sit around and cry over him. I decided though, that I was better off not being at work on such a day. It is not the best environment to be in when feeling down, as you are not regarded in a "positive" light if you show you are human!

So, one year on, and what have I learnt? Well, that I have more courage and determination than I knew I did. That I am stronger and more assertive than I used to be. I am starting to see the glass as half full - not always half empty. Most importantly of all - I am a work in progress. A masterpiece that is not yet complete.